For some reason, I have a really hard time believing people when they compliment or encourage me. I chalk it up to them just "being nice".
Needless to say, this drives my husband completely nutso. He is seriously the most loving, patient, and encouraging man that I have ever met. He is all the good things that I am not...and somehow (thank you, Jesus) he fell in love with and married me.
|Because I mentioned my husband, I know you wanted to see a wedding picture... :)|
I was reading a blog today that was talking about overcoming lies. She asks the question, "if you don't know what the Truth is, how can you believe it?". I know that self-esteem, confidence, passion, joy, all of these things stem from a daily relationship with Christ. I, as awful as it sounds, lose sight of that from time to time, beat myself up about it, and sink lower and lower thinking that I am unworthy to believe the truth.
See, I forget that my identity is found in Christ. I search so hard for it in my husband, in my friends, in my family when I really need to be searching Christ.
But now thus says the Lord, he who created you, O Jacob, he who formed you, O Israel: “Fear not, for I have redeemed you; I have called you by name, you are mine.
I also struggle with why Christ would want me, this over-analytical, impatient, forgetful, cray cray girl by his side. Then I remember...
God is love.
I Corinthians 13:4-7
Love is patient and kind. Love is not jealous or boastful or proud or rude. It does not demand its own way. It is not irritable, and it keeps no record of being wronged. It does not rejoice about injustice but rejoices whenever the truth wins out. Love never gives up, never loses faith, is always hopeful, and endures through every circumstance.
God loves me at my worst. All those things that in my head would distance me from him, are the things that draw me to him, remind me of his greatness, and reiterate what a loving God I have.
As for man, his days are like grass; he flourishes like a flower of the field; for the wind passes over it, and it is gone, and its place knows it no more. But the steadfast love of the Lord is from everlasting to everlasting on those who fear him, and his righteousness to children's children.
It's that love that makes me want to be more like him. He is solid and never changing.
In high school, my anthem was love. The songs I picked for worship had to do with God's love. I'd do anything for anybody to show them I loved them, even if I felt like I was being taken advantage of. If I were to only meet a person one time, what I would hope that they would remember would be that I loved them.
I feel like I started to lose that part way through college. Leaving for college was a major turning point in my life, and I started having to deal with some things (relationships, fears, wounds). I got bitter about them, and while I worked through a lot, there are still areas where I let my bitterness speak instead of my love.
It's been for too long. It's time reset. I want to serve in love. I want love to me my life's message. I want to leave a legacy of love.
1 Corinthians 13:1-3
If I could speak all the languages of earth and of angels, but didn’t love others, I would only be a noisy gong or a clanging cymbal. If I had the gift of prophecy, and if I understood all of God’s secret plans and possessed all knowledge, and if I had such faith that I could move mountains, but didn’t love others, I would be nothing. If I gave everything I have to the poor and even sacrificed my body, I could boast about it; but if I didn’t love others, I would have gained nothing.
Well, thanks for taking a few moments out to listen to what is on my heart today. There is nothing as refreshing to my spirit as scripture. I hope you find these passages encouraging today. For me, I need to start planting these words in my heart, so that they bear fruit in my actions.
Have a wonderful Thursday!